Moving abroad is one of the best things I’ve ever done in my life… and I’ve done a lot for only having about 30 years on this planet. I share highlights and all the most exciting parts of finding a home in a new country, but there is a negative side too.
Most of this negativity surrounding moving aboard comes from people who wanted to move away from their home country and chose a new country that met their needs. Their main focus was leaving instead of assimilating to a new culture. This is the biggest mistake someone moving abroad could make. Instead, the focus should be on which country do you want to be a part of – where are you excited about new foods, language, people, culture, art, history?
If you’re ready to embrace a completely new life where the learning curve is as steep as the streets of Lisboa, that’s when you’re ready to move abroad to a country that’s vastly different from the US. If you just want to leave the US, Canada is the most similar culturally and linguistically, followed by the UK. Regardless of where you choose to live, this article highlights some of the challenges most people face when moving abroad.
A lot of the “negative” parts of moving abroad is just noise. It’s not for everyone, and some people do try to force the move. Overall, going with the flow and excitement for learning is going to be the best way to adapt when moving abroad! If you’re a chill and open minded person, you’ll be just fine 🙂
Here’s what you need to know before you move abroad:
1. Open-mindedness gets you far
You must be open to new cultures, new food, new ways of doing things, new holidays, and new language. For some people, this is super exciting (like for me). For others, they are pretty stuck in their ways and it’s a challenge to adapt.
Taking the time to learn the local ways of doing things and trying to integrate those things into your life is key – even the most simple things. That could mean shopping at local farmers markets, carrying a machete around with you in Costa Rica, hang drying your clothes in Europe, or how to greet new people. You’ll need to be open minded to make a home abroad.
2. Language learning will change your experience
If you are moving to a new country where you don’t speak the language, you will want to learn the new language. Even if there’s a thriving immigrant community in your native language. Inevitably, things happen: immigration procedures, health emergency, car emergency, or traveling to smaller towns… and you’ll need to communicate with those around you.
If you think it’ll be impossible for you to learn at least the basics of a new language, consider a country that already speaks your native language. We talk a lot more about our language learning journey in the Learn Portuguese section of our blog. It’s not about fluency either; it’s about being able to effectively communicate in situations when you’re alone in a country and shit happens.
3. Ok with lack of convenience
This one is specifically for people moving abroad from the US. The US is arguably the country with the most convenience. Everything is basically same-day or 2-day shipping. There are drive-thrus in even the smallest towns for the necessities of life: pharmacy, food, banks, grocery, and more. You can live your life in the US without leaving your home or car.
This is not really the case anywhere else in the world. You’ll probably need to shop more frequently for groceries since most other countries have fresher produce and foods. You’ll likely need to shop in multiple stores to get things like clothes, food, medications, etc. compared to Walmart that has it all in one spot. In my opinion, it’s more convenient to live in a super walkable town with local markets and shops because you don’t have to drive… ever. But, for many people in the US, it’s quite the adjustment.
4. Do things the local way first
Learn how the locals do a certain task before forcing your way.
Why do locals keep their windows open even in the winter? It’s likely to air out the home to prevent mold and humidity.
How do locals get to the next city? Probably by public transportation.
Before adapting your home/lifestyle to be the same as your previous country, try it like the locals first. I’ve noticed that there’s usually a good reason for doing things a certain way even if it seems odd or more difficult than what we’d be used to.
5. You’ll miss countless milestone events
Weddings, funerals, births, health crises, Phish shows – all of it. When you move abroad, the reality is you’ll miss out on major events for family and friends back in your home country. You’ve got to be ok with this.
Even if you have all the money in the world to fly back and forth, the reality is immigration sometimes keeps you in your new country or the logistics just don’t work out. This has been a challenge for us this year more than ever: two of my sisters are pregnant, my best friend from law school is getting married, my family is putting on a big family reunion, and Phish played three weekends at The Sphere. We’ll likely miss all of it because we’re in the midst of renewing temporary residency in Portugal.
6. Patience is your best friend
Learning everything new for the first time is like an information overload. It’s super exciting and awesome and sometimes takes a while to get a hang of it. I was really frustrated with myself for not being more fluent in Portuguese faster. But I realized that I need to have patience. I’m a bit older than I was when I last learned a new language, so it takes time.
This learning curve applies to logistics of living abroad as well. I was a lawyer in the US. So, it was frustrating to not fully understand legal processes here in Portugal and equally frustrating to rely on others to move forward with processes. One of the biggest reasons I am able to be patient in Portugal is the fact I lived in a van full time while traveling for 3 years. You learn a lot of patience on the road, and that translated well to moving abroad. You will not be able to control everything, and going into it knowing that will save you so much stress.
7. Time difference will affect your relationships
If you move to a country with a large time difference from where your family and friends live, you’ll need to schedule times to chat and put more intentional effort into maintaining those relationships.
I miss my sister daily, and it feels like we talk way less. We both live abroad, so we understand the difficulties, but our time zones are usually 7 hours different. When juggling life, kids, responsibilities, and a full day time zone difference, connecting is a challenge. On the flip side, even though she lives abroad, she lives in the Americas so she has a similar time zone to her US friends and family.
8. Nobody cares about your job outside the US
People from the US emphasize work over everything else. Most people around the world do not care what you do for your job, how much money you make, or how amazing your career is. I have friends here in Portugal for 3 years and I have no idea what their job is. That’s normal here because nobody talks about work.
When moving abroad, change your intro question from “what do you do for work?” to “what do you do for fun?”
You’ll be received much better when meeting new people this way.
Moving abroad is the best thing my husband and I have ever done. I truly can’t imagine living in the US again. If these all sound like easy things, you’re ready to move abroad.
And in terms of building a new community. I’ve found the best way is to do things you love. Find others that love it too. I’m a live music fan and found my community through music – attending shows, talking about them, and meeting people in the industry. I also did CrossFit and met a ton of great people at our local gym. I’ve tried to embrace new hobbies while incorporating the ones I always loved like attending science lectures, joining local activist groups like Lagos Mais Verde, and saying ‘yes’ when someone asks me to come along on a new adventure.
Do all the things you love to find your crew abroad.
If you’re planning on moving to Portugal and are looking for some more help on how to do that, we have an ultimate resource guide for Americans moving to Portugal! In includes relocation services that will help with the immigration process like Start Abroad, my favorite European Portuguese course, Facebook groups with extensive guides, how to find housing, and more.
I came here from another page and stayed. This cleared up a few things for me, which I really appreciate. this is worth saving.
Thanks! I hope it helps you if you decide to move abroad to a new country.